First of all, i wanted to let you know about The lieutenants's part. It got updated with Kinzie's biography (n°4). Read it for your safety and mental health.

Next, i've got to tell you about what happened to me yesterday:
I've been asked on the spaceship by the team while i was having exciting holidays playing Pinball, Poker and Zombie Uprising.

I went to the game room where Pierce used to spend his time, but there was no one...! So i wondered if Matt was playing video games and went in the storeroom near the sofa but... he wasn't here.

As Ben King used to spend his time making dedications (Not sure to know who is it for), i thought i would find him in the kitchen.
But nop.
Quiet place again.

I wondered about Cid and took an eye in the love room. But there was just a dildo-bat and something glaucous.
Everyone was probably in the cockpit so it was my next direction. But there was no one to tell me what i was fucking doing here.
I went to the "toilets" (in case they were doing a pooh reunion)/ But i met some inflatable dolls.

At this point, things really got scary for me. Especially that no one either seemed to be at the simulation's room.
I entered it... but can't remember what happened next. All what i can say is that i woke up with a bump on the head after a long sleep.
I looked all around me. It was hot. It was dark. It was red. It was an infinite night. I was in hell.
I first thought they killed me but found a camera around my neck with that message: "Consider it's a foretaste for all the shit you wrote about us on the website. Now, find all the assholes who are populating the place and shoot them."

It was signed "Matt". But i knew it was Shaundi's writing.
I was all alone in that unknown land just near Ultor's building. Courageous... Brave... VALIANT! I entered it and faced... my ex-bosses: Viola and Kiki.
I cried of joy and hugged them as i suffer the Stockholm syndrome.
Irritated, they asked about my presence, so i told them about my story.

You will have to refer to Dane Vogel's description to know more about that guy(as soon as i will have write it). Waiting for that, here are the pics i took from that jerk as the twins and him now work together.

The first pic date from 2008. He was young, full of life and alive. He has been killed by the Boss but it seems like he now find some usefulness to our leader. The girls didn't wanted to tell me more about what they were doing as it was confidential. So, all what i have are those pics. (Dane loves himself. That's why he wanted me to take pictures under all his quite best profiles)
I asked girls to help me getting out of hell, but they answered me that if they knew how to do that, they wouldn't loose their time hunting me out of Ultor.

I thought the next step would be going to be worse than ever as crossing those horrible civilians was like meeting... nah, there was nothing different from what we used too see on earth. That's why it was awful.

After few minutes hanging around, two angels falled from the sky making my walk rough and dizzy. I failed from ending in the magma while i was caught up by Gat's muscular and warm arms. He was doing his Colgate's smile to me.
I will always remember... (I know it sounds like a 14 years old's FFF (Fangirl Fanfic Fantasy), but i'm not making this up).
Anyway, it was just before Kinzie told him there was no time to loose and catched my arm to make me travel like a hawk's prey (The landing wasn't soft). I did as i could, but here are the pics i took from each territory's leaders while i was shakened like a milkshake:

Here are Blackbeard The Pirate, William Shakespeare and Vlad The Impaler. Une belle brochette.

The real problem comes from the last one. The one who kidnapped the Boss to make him marry his daughter Jezebel: Satan.



I did my best but i can't withdraw with those flashing memories since i saw his... you know? The... yeah. I mean... How to describe this...! That giant...
Banana.
I have that Cyrano De Bergerac quote in mind: "Tis cock! .. a dick! .. a snake! - A snake, forsooth! 'Tis a penisfull!"
Err... wait, no. Maybe it was: "‘Tis a rock!…a peak!…a cape! A cape forsooth! ‘Tis a peninsular!". (Well, that's pretty the same).
That's why the pic is blurred.

As to her daughter... did you know that she was a good singer? And she is not the only one. You will never guess THAT!

Group therapy's session time now.

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